This post is like a month old I forgot to publish it sry

So school started. Which is not that terrible because it keeps me from throwing the plants off my balcony one by one out of boredom. Also, so far it seems like this year is gonna feel like a lukewarm bath with the occasional chance of piranhas, so as long as I know how to surf the waves of homework and classtests, I should be fine. (We 're reading poetry in class now and it might have an influence on my writing style. Sorry.)
Here's a list of things that happened so far
-I have a slightly irrational, but still very real anger directed towards a guy who drew something I wanted to draw in art class, so now I give him the evil eye whenever we meet in the hallway. I'm not very good at it though, so he probably just thinks I have an eye infection.
- We had to write a text giving background information to a short story we read in english class. What I didn't know was that it was supposed to be a romantic story, so I wrote about the alien invasion. My teacher made me read it out loud and now I think he might make me an appointment at the school's psychologist.
- I paid the lunch lady in colombian money and she didn't even notice
- A friend turned 15 so we bought him a cactus. Yay.
- I downloaded the last part of a book I really like, but I'm saving it for the weekend and THE STRUGGLE IS REAL.
- I walked in on my frech teacher playing techno music on the smart board before class started. We held eyes contact for a second and then I walked out and we both quietly agreed to pretend it never happened
- stop with the harambe posts
-just stop

Surprise Heraclitus

I've lived in Bielefeld for almost a year now, and I feel like I've changed on more than just the cellular level. So here's a handy guide to recognize me in case we randomly meet.

- I guess I'm more adventurous in my nail polish choices. Meaning I have progressed from black to dark grey. The opposite has occurred in my sense of humor and photographs of North Korea at night (I haven't found a correlation between these things yet but I'm working on it)
- I had to give up wearing different socks on thursdays. I would like to say it's because I have grown and matured and realized there are better ways to fight boring routines, but it's mostly due to my mother boycotting it. That's how most great revolutions are stopped.
- I do Yoga now but I keep falling asleep during shavasana and I really don't know how I feel about the omm part
- I'm more confident I guess and I hang out with guys more often (those two are not related either because I'm a young independent woman who don't need no man but will hang out with anyone who makes good puns)
- i still can't snap my fingers but I've gotten better at faking it so my music teacher doesn't look at me passive-aggressively
- I'm not as bossy in group projects anymore. Like I don't even proof-read my group members' texts. This is an achievement for someone who wouldn't let you color in the headline a year ago
- I'm afraid I've been germanized in the sense that I wear crop tops and mascara on some days. No nikes or rolled up pants though, it's gonna take me a bit more leberwurst to get to that level of german
- I still think of Belgrade, and I miss it, but it would also be weird to be there again.

Random stuff that happened in school lately

- I finally had the opportunity to spontaneously use a Jane Austen quote when someone yelled at a friend just for coughing in class (he didn't get the reference though) (that always makes me feel either very important or very lonely) (guess which one it was this time) (cries silently in a corner while  reciting Darcy's last monologue)
- I wore a pyjama to school just for the fuck of it. No one noticed
- my science teacher has a very subtle way of encouraging students to pick his subject (*Cough* you're a girl *cough* pls do science we need more girls)
- my history teacher accidentally opened a porn ad while preparing a movie
- someone pointed at me in the hallway and said “that's her“ so I'm basically famous now
- I finally got to use my sick 100 percent effective pickup lines when our english teacher made us try speed dating
- one guy keeps shoving his butt in my face on the stairs so i decided to write him a haiku

~a haiku to the tall guy who wears his pants really low~
Your butt's in my face
I need my personal space
Get the fuck away

*Back on track after that short and absolutely necessary lyrical intermission*

- I have come to the conclusion that the only thing worse than three guys thinking thermodynamics are too complicated for you are three guys making you work on thermodynamics while they discuss video games
- my english teacher keeps using the word daddy and it's really uncomfortable

I can't do first impressions

So recently I found out that I have a slightly bitchy look on my face when meeting new people. I also tend to either be wildly sarcastic or add an awkward amount of hehes to every sentence, making me sound like the spirit animal of all creepy uncles on family reunions. (There seems to be a very specific etiquette on the number of hehes you are allowed to use in a conversation. Experience has taught me to never say hehe and “I'm gonna pick up my sister“ in the same sentence. Also avoid “If you know what I mean“ paired with a wink or lift of an eyebrow). But honestly, why would you judge anyone by your first impression of them? I bet you also blog about them and compare their clothing to Räuber Hotzenplotz. So don't judge a book by its awkward or sarcastic cover or its Winnie Poo shirt or because it wears unmatching socks on Thursdays. (This analogy worked way better in my head). I would like to sincerely apologize to every person who has only met the antisocial or slightly arrogant version of me. I promise, once you get to know me, I will tell you some fabulous chemistry puns. *
*my life would be so much easier if they just made coffee mugs with this sentence on it instead of that keep calm bullshit